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December 31, 2001

   My New Year's resolution: stop the alleged grade inflation for the movie reviews on BigFlax.com.  I've tried to start with Vanilla Sky, but if you think the grade doesn't resemble the review, yell at me some more.  I'm not sure how exactly I'll prevent this grade inflation... but I'll try harder.

December 29, 2001

   Jan has just become the first person to hit double-digits in the Bowl Challenge, having correctly picked ten of the first twelve games.  Jan, I hate you.

    Also, there is a new Poll of the Week, people.   Just because I took it off the main page doesn't mean it's not there.   (Although I am getting bloody well sick of it.)

December 28, 2001

   Just watched two of the 45 Monty Python episodes I now own... yes, as good as expected.

    In things that were not as good as expected, I was mathematically eliminated from the BigFlax.com College Bowl Challenge last night, when Alabama beat Iowa State.  (Do not ask.)  What a joke.

    Also up... ooh, it's a new BigFlax t-shirt.  This one actually has some potential to move, too, not that I expect any of you cheapskates to buy one.  (Once again, it will just be me.)  I'm too lazy to give you a link to the store, though.  Go back to the main page, and the store is in through the "Me" button.

December 25, 2001

   Oooooh, Christmas.  Actually, it's ten past eight, so Christmas is functionally over (only the immediate family and my dad's cousin Mark remain).  This is a good time to update on the day's presents.
    I picked up several new DVDs.  Four movies, increasing my total in that category to 35, not to mention my gift wish o' the year, the Complete Monty Python (fourteen discs, anyone?), increasing my total of DVDs and DVD sets to 37.  For more on that, you can always check out the DVD page and try and figure out which ones are new.
    I also got many books and a few clothes.  Thankfully, none of them sucked, although none quite match the thrill of the Monty Python set, though transferring said set back to Evanston will be what is commonly referred to as "a massive pain in the ass."
    I also, in the process of not falling asleep until about 5:30 Christmas morning, both started and finished reading High Fidelity.  I'm not sure whether I liked it better than the movie (probably), though I can certainly say I liked it a pretty good deal.  If you're talking to me in the next week or so, while it's still fresh, expect me to reference it, particularly if I think you've read it (though I can only think of two people I know who definitely have).  Sorry.

December 24, 2001

   Ooh, it's Christmas Eve (albeit quarter to three in the morning).  Here's an early present for all of you: the latest movie review: The Fellowship of the Ring.

December 20, 2001

   Review up: Ocean's Eleven.

December 18, 2001

   It's college football's bowl season again, and the first game is tonight, when Colorado State and North Texas kick it off in the New Orleans Bowl, the matchup no one could possibly care about.  (Here's a hint: if you add the records of the teams involved and it doesn't come over .500, there are problems.)
    What you could care about are my bowl picks and the BigFlax.com 2001 College Bowl Challenge.  The former, which feature nifty graphics and occasionally snarky explanations, are here.  The challenge, which includes my picks as well as the picks of eight others, with a big eighteen bucks on the line, can be found here.

December 16, 2001

   Call it a nostalgia killer.  I rode the train home from Chicago on Friday/Saturday and, you know what, it didn't really do too much to rekindle those days of yore.
    Started off in Chicago at 9:20 Friday night.  Really, though, we started at ten because it left late.  That was about when we found out that the Three Rivers, unlike the old Broadway Limited, doesn't have a dining car.  It has a "cafe" or something, which relegated us to microwavable pizzas and Sara Lee cheese danishes for the entirety of the ride.  Bear in mind the ride is more than twenty hours.  If I'd wanted nothing resembling "real food," I could have taken a plane, on which the trip is about two hours and they don't even pretend there will be meal service.
    Then of course there was the room.  To be fair, if we'd known from the start it was going to be my dad and me in the room, we might have sprung for a bigger room.  But to say things were "a little cramped" is probably an understatement.  It didn't help that my dad had decided not to check his suitcase (who knows how bad it would have been had I not checked mine), though at least that meant that I had somewhere to put my feet when I stretched them across the room.  We basically spent Saturday pointing at alternate 45-degree angles and trying not to infringe too much on the other's personal space.
    Speaking of infringing on personal space, see if you can guess where the bathroom was?  Yeah, it was in the room, and I don't mean in a little closet like in the bigger rooms when I was a kid.  I mean, lift up the panel and there's the toilet.  Needless to say, this affords you lots of privacy, and I'm sorry, I can't use the bathroom very effectively when my dad is sitting two feet away (if it was that much) reading a book.  So I was periodically sending him out of the room (that train ginger ale goes right through you).  He at least had the tact to only use the facilities at night when I was in the upper bunk.
    Speaking of the upper bunk, that had to be the thinnest bed ever, not to mention the one with the tightest bedclothes (the yanking and kicking I had to do to push the blankets back was more than a little annoying).  To put it another way, don't even consider having sex on a train unless you're going to spend all night in the missionary position, because there won't be anywhere for two of you to go when you're done.  (Have I alienated you enough yet?  And listen to me talking about sex like the expert I am.)
    All this neglects possibly the biggest thing, which was the inability to shower.  In the case of the room size and dining car, the problems now arose from changes the train had made.  In the case of the shower, the problem arose from changes I had made; in other words, somewhere between 1993 (the last possible year that I could have been on a sleeper train, to the best of my recollection) and now, I realized I needed to take a shower every day to avoid becoming completely disgusting.  I will spare you the gory details, but suffice it to say I didn't take one Saturday morning.   There was a shower, but you've got to be kidding me.  I'd rather live for a day with just washing my face than try to negotiate the shower on an Amtrak train.   The whole episode made me considerably rethink my desire to criss-cross the country on two-nighters like the California Zephyr and the Empire Builder.  I don't think I'd even want to make this trip again, a comparatively short one (well less than half the mileage of those two), at least not until they add a full dining car.
    Oh, but of course, I do have to do this again, to go back to Chicago in a few weeks.

December 14, 2001

   Kind of a fun night last night.   First I got to go to Blind Faith (think my dad was in town?), where, as usual, I proved that I probably like vegetarian food more than any other non-vegetarian on the planet.  (Okay, probably not - I'm sure there are people who claim to be vegetarians and love the food, and then still eat fish.  But among non-phonies, I'm right up there.)
    Then I made about a buck-fifty in the laundry room.  The change slots in two of the dryers were choked with quarters (apparently someone didn't realize that it wasn't working), so I pulled out my keys, stuck one in, and rattled the quarters loose.  I think I got four or five out of the first one, and then another quarter out of the second one.  A good time, all in all.
    This is also the last December update from Evanston, as I leave tonight for the long train ride home (this had better be as fun as I remember) to New Jersey.   Booya.  See you when I get back.

December 12, 2001

   I was at Taco Bell tonight (yeah, I know what you're thinking, but Chipotle closed early for dubious reasons) and there were a couple of guys stirring up a bit of a commotion with the Hispanic woman behind the counter.  Apparently she was looking at them funny (she really wasn't looking at them much at all, except for when they were intentionally talking loud enough to be heard by her), and their response to this was basically to swear a lot and give her a hard time for singling them out.
    Do you have a guess as to what race they belonged to?  No?   Well, what if I told you that they said she was singling them out because she was prejudiced?  Got one now?
    Well, the answer is they were African-American.  Given that I told you the woman was Hispanic, that sort of narrowed it down, didn't it?  I say this not out of any racist leanings on my part but simply because I am sick of this sort of phenomenon: members of minority groups who seem to think that their minority status makes them untouchable somehow.
    Now hear this: just because your great-grandparents were slaves, or your grandfather had to drink from a separate fountain, or anything of the sort, does not give you the right to be an ass.  (Nothing does, frankly.)  In addition to that, when people call you on being an ass, you do not have the right to play the race card.  I'd imagine anyone who was actually a victim of racism would find this monumentally offensive.

    Scenario: two customers at a fast-food restaurant are talking loudly, in a fashion generally considered inappropriate in public.  The white woman behind the counter asks them to stop.
    It is possible to imagine the exact same thing happening with two white customers or two black customers.  One thing is for sure, though: the two white customers will not call the woman a racist.  Whether the black customers would depends on the individuals - I do not for a minute mean to insinuate that all black people would simply continue to be asses.  However, despite the likely fact that the woman would say the same thing to any two people causing a scene, there is at least the possibility the blacks would call her a racist.  If the whites did, they would simply be laughed at.

    Last Sunday I was on the El going down to Howard.   At Dempster, a group of African-American men got on.  They proceeded to play glee club all the way down to Howard (mercifully only three stops), although they seemed to be singing Nelly.
    Now, it shouldn't be too surprising that no one in the car said anything, although most likely no one would have said anything to the white glee club either.  However, it should be noted that the song in question contained some pretty questionable lyrics, not to mention profanity.  Not exactly the thing for public transport.  While no one said anything, most of the car at least seemed to act visibly annoyed - including one middle-aged black woman who glared at them the entire way down, a dislike they seemed to feed off of.

    Scenario: I'm on the El with my four-year-old daughter Phoebe (in joke!).  A group of people are singing, loudly, a song with lyrics that I don't want her to be hearing.  Suppose I say something to them.
    Now suppose the middle-aged black woman says something to them.  I wouldn't necessarily expect them to stop in either case (again, it depends on whether they're nice guys who just don't realize they're causing a scene or whether that's in fact the intent; but based on how they reacted to this woman's visible irritation I'd say they were proud of themselves), but if she asks them, there is 100% no chance that she gets shouted down as a racist.  There may not be much chance that I am, but there is a chance that I hear something like, "What, you don't like black people?"
    Before you think that last line is a stretch, realize that I and several of my friends were once called racists by a panhandler on the streets of Evanston because we wouldn't give him any change.  Never mind the fact that I wouldn't give a white guy change either - generally speaking I don't give it at all, particularly around here where a lot of the "homeless people" are career panhandlers, according to EPD.  We got this (and a whole lot of other swearing) because we wouldn't give him a quarter; one can only imagine where "attempts to curtail the freedom of speech" (and that's in quotes for a reason) might go if the addressee was similarly irritable.

    To sum up: I have absolutely no problem with anyone in the world - so long as they are not jerks.  And I would say I know way more white jerks than minority jerks - though to be fair, there are more of us in this country, and I don't have the jerk percentage figures in front of me.  The point here, though, is that if you're a jerk, you're a jerk, and you can't hide behind anything to avoid that fact - least of all your race.  As I mentioned before, it's offensive to people who have actually suffered - been beaten back by firehoses, torn off lunch counters, hit by rocks while they tried to attend school - to claim that your right to do whatever the hell you want in public, irregardless of the feelings of others, is protected by your minority status, and that people who don't like what you're doing, even though they're allowed to be annoyed just as much as you are to do it, must be prejudiced against you because of your skin color.
    Give me a break.

December 12, 2001

   It must be the middle of December, because here come the reviews.  Today: Heist.

December 11, 2001

   Sleep schedule has been a little odd, but I think I normalized it with the 5:30-11:30 nap this morning.   Thrills.  When I came to, I decided to go out and see the best film of the year.

December 10, 2001

   Ooh, it's the first all-nighter of the year!  (Assuming I don't die in the middle, of course.)  What have I been doing instead of working?  Why, writing songs, of course.  Can you see/hear them?   Uh, no.  I'm very protective as, as most of you know, I have pretty much no musical talent.  I've also been eating Gummi Savers and talking to Selvey and Leah (now back in the lovely Waukomis) a lot.  So yeah, my life is really interesting, isn't it?  This is like the requisite once-a-month update where I frighten away any new readers.  Fun?
    Oh, I almost forgot.  Jan recently had a series of online test results up on his website.  Never one to let Jan have all the fun (or to skip on a chance to rip someone off), here are my results in the exact same tests.  But now those of you who don't bother clicking through to Jan's site (read: all of you) can take the tests and find out what kind of weirdos you are.

If I was an Autobot, I'd be:
Click to see what Autobot you could be!
Take the Transformers personality test at android5.com!

(Side note: I do not prefer Linux to Windows, although I guess they've got me otherwise.)

If I were a work of art, I would be Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa.

I am extremely popular and widely known. Although unassuming and unpretentious, my enigmatic smile has charmed millions. I am a mystery, able to be appreciated from afar, but ultimately unknowable and thus intriguing.

Which work of art would you be? The Art Test

Even though I would have to dispute my status as "extremely popular," I appreciate that.  Of course, I already am a work of art... *cough*

If I were a James Bond villain, I would be Auric Goldfinger.

I enjoy golf, gold, and bisecting people with industrial lasers.

I am played by Gert Fröbe in Goldfinger.

Who would you be? James Bond Villain Personality Test

Before you read too much into this, take the test and consider the limited answering opportunities.

I am a Lobster Telephone.

For nine potatoes have my multi-throttled keys subdued the nice leaves of strangers. Sprays of wild satin guacamole enters my document. I relish four mushroom deals with metal.

Do you bite the wax tadpole? The Utterly Surreal Test

I was heartened to know that I got the original Chinese translation of Coca-Cola in my explanation, since I love that story. (They've since changed it to something which sounds like "Coca-Cola" but instead means like "Smiling Happy Mouth" or whatever. Why that was so hard to do in the first place, I have no idea.)

December 7, 2001

   Weird day.  First I get up at eight (that is not supposed to happen during Reading Week) to go take my 230 final.  Then I meet Grandma and Grandpa for lunch, then we sojourn to Lake Zurich to see Aunt Joan and "baby" Alex (I can't really still call him that, even if I want to).  Then we're heading back to Evanston to meet Uncle Andrew and Aunt Jennifer (I still feel a little weird saying that, though I can't help but wonder if she'd feel weird hearing it) for dinner, and... well, there was a little dozing, and a little curb action, and a little blowing out of two car tires.  This resulted in a two-hour sit outside an Alzheimer's care facility in Northbrook while waiting for a replacement car to arrive from O'Hare.  Oh yeah.  I hope AAA isn't reading this... it's bad enough my dad will read this and then call my grandpa immediately and demand to know why he fell asleep while driving.  Or something.  (He probably won't, which is also good.)
    Then dinner and back.  So not really all that eventful, except for thump thump pop roll.  Don't expect this weekend to get any cooler, because it won't.

December 3, 2001

   Interesting weekend plus.  I already told you about Saturday in my Saturday night/Sunday morning update, but then there was Sunday and also Monday.  Sunday I went down to Belmont to meet up with Leah, where we walked around and thankfully did not go to any sex stores (mostly CD and such stores).  Leah also proved to be the most unsubtle person in the world when it comes to gifts.  It's bad enough to ask someone which of two CDs they want, get an answer, and take that CD for purchase, but she also stopped in front of the Hannah and her Sisters DVD and cooed over it.  Now, I know she likes Woody Allen, so I was going to get it anyway but I, being slightly more subtle, was waiting until I didn't think she could see me.  She walked halfassedly around the corner and then came back and demanded to know why I hadn't picked it up yet.  Bam.
    Then we came back up to Evanston because we'd been planning to get the "gang" together for a while but hadn't been able to work anything out among the four of us.  So Leah followed me back and we tracked down Jan and Selvey.  We went to J.K. Sweets and then, as if that wasn't enough sugar, made a Krispy Kreme run.   Leah and I proceeded to watch Hannah and her Sisters, which I'd seen half of before but which was pretty good, although I wondered what Michael Caine really did to deserve that Oscar.
    Then in the morning (hoo hoo... only not) we met up with Selvey again for lunch and he, having a car, drove us down to U of C where we dropped Leah off.   So we got to see her dorm, which was interesting, but kind of annoying because her room is not only bigger than my room this year (although so are some sport utility vehicles) but probably also my room last year, and that of course was a double.  Woo.
    Okay, it would have been much more interesting if you were there.   One point is that I busted out the video camera for the first time in forever (actually, this is the first time it's had a tape in it since I bought this one), but I didn't have much battery time (fixed that, only too late to get any footage), so the result is 1:54 of Leah, Selvey, and Jan in Selvey's car Sunday night.  Thrillsville.

December 2, 2001

   Yesterday was busy.  First I did "play-by-play" for the WNUR Sports vs. Daily Sports football game.  You may recall last year we lost 12-8 on a late score - this year we won 13-7 on a late score.   It was pretty cool.  Then I went and did color for the women's basketball game.  Unfortunately they lost, but at least it was a pretty competitive game.   Plus Nemo played highlights from my call of the Daily game on the air during an update, which cracked me up.
    Speaking of these, you can check out the full Daily game page here.  And if you think I'm a dork when it comes to things no one else cares about, wait until you see what happens when I get a hold of material other people do care about.

There's more! View last month's updates.

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This page last updated: Wednesday, February 20, 2002 08:12:47 PM